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Posts Tagged ‘economic stimulus’

I recently read a humorous bit about bailouts and stimulus:

IMPORTANT INFORMATION FOR AMERICANS ON THE U.S. STIMULUS PAYMENTS

This year, taxpayers will receive an Economic Stimulus Payment.

This is a very exciting new program that I will explain using the Q and A format:

Q. What is an Economic Stimulus Payment?
A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers.

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. Only a teeny amount of what you paid.

Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn’t that stimulating the economy of China?
A. Shut up.

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:

  • If you spend that money at Wal-Mart, all the money will go to China.
  • If you spend it on gasoline, it will go to the Arabs.
  • If you purchase a computer, it will go to India, China, or Taiwan.
  • If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala .
  • If you buy a car,it will go to Japan.
  • If you purchase useless crap, it will go to Taiwan.

And none of it will help the American economy.

We need to keep that money here in America. You can keep the money in America by spending it at yard sales, going to a baseball game, or spend it on:

  1. prostitutes,
  2. beer (domestic ONLY), or
  3. tattoos,

since those are the only businesses still in the US.

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An interesting panel: Peter Schiff author of “Crash Proof”, Dr. Yaron Brook from the Ayn Rand Institute, Victoria Barrett associate editor for Forbes Magazine, and Gary Kaltbaum of garyk.com. The panel criticizes the actions of the U.S. government, Federal Reserve, and discusses the future of the economy.

Watch Peter Schiff plug in Ron Paul and Yaron Brook remind the audience of what should be government’s core functions with regard to individual rights under capitalism.

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We’ve featured Europac President Peter Schiff’s insights here before and this clip from an interview in CNN isn’t much different, except for how it suspiciously ends. Watch.

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