Posts Tagged ‘gender’

A lighter topic for a change. On relationships: I read recently about the anguish of a girl from Atlanta, a not so uncommon sentiment among women these days: “There aren’t enough men to go around.” But according to this blogger, this is becoming a serious problem in Atlanta:

Last time I checked there was 21 women for everyone 1 man and the problem doesn’t stop there because the you have to factor in the homosexual males, men with kids, liars & cheaters, people with stds, no job etc.   The problem is so big that the unattractive and broke down men now think they have a choice, lol.  Granted all of the women here in Atlanta are not wife material but there are plenty of good women out here who are at their wits end.  Living here you can’t play by the same rules like not taking care of your man mentally, sexually, etc because if you don’t some other woman will.

Sadly because of the high demand for a man you’re finding many women settling for the bottom feeders who would never stand a chance anywhere else.  I mean you know it’s bad when you see women working and men sitting at home with no job, using her car, and still having the nerve to cheat.

Interestingly, girls in Atlanta don’t have to go far for “decent” advice. Jeff Herring in an ezine article offers his “analysis” of the Atlanta Singles Dating Myths:

What this does is foster the myth that good partners are scarce and hard to find. If this its true, then you beter settle for whatever you can find.

Results of this myth

In a word, desperation. You stay with somemone who is not right for you, just to be with someone. Sets up a miserable situation.

What to do

This is one of those situtations where attitude is everything. When you approoach dating from an attitude of scarcity, you see scarcity. When you approach dating from an attitude of plenty and abundance, you see plenty and abundance.

It’s all about attitude eh? (read: Law Of Attraction again?). How’s this for attitude: our favorite cynical Chinese girl Intsiksiomai offers her take on an inherent flaw in that legendary female intuition which can help explain the devastation of women in Atlanta: girls simply fall for jerks very easily:

Most girls overlook this weakness in men, until it’s too late. They have married one! Girls get easily flattered with the protectiveness and concern of jerks. Girls often allow their men to control them like robots, all under the guise of love. Girls give up their career, and even their basic human rights for the pleasure of the jerks.

It’s also with some sense of eerie coincidence that a Chinese girl would offer this insight, because if you really think men are in short supply, whether as a statistical fact or simply a whimsical notion, then you better pack your bags and get headed for China: where centuries of male-preferential breeding has actually created a real gender concentration:

WUHAN, China — Chinese traditions, a tough one-child-per-couple policy and modern medical technology have combined to create a demographic nightmare that threatens China’s stability and endangers prospects for greater political freedom in the country with the world’s largest population. Over the next two decades, as many as 40 million young Chinese men won’t be able to marry, settle down and start families. There won’t be enough wives to go around.

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If you’re a guy chances are you love computer games. If you love computer games, chances are you’re a guy? Is it a chauvinist statement?

According to the Telegraph, there’s a biological and psychological basis:

Playing on computer consoles activates parts of the male brain which are linked to rewarding feelings and addiction, scans have shown. The more opponents they vanquish and points they score, the more stimulated this region becomes.

In contrast, these parts of women’s brains are much less likely to be triggered by sessions on the Sony PlayStation, Nintendo Wii or Xbox.

Professor Allan Reiss of the Centre for Interdisciplinary Brain Sciences Research at Stanford University, California, who led the research, said that women understood computer games just as well as men but did not have the same neurological drive to win.

“These gender differences may help explain why males are more attracted to, and more likely to become ‘hooked’ on video games than females,” he said.

“I think it’s fair to say that males tend to be more intrinsically territorial. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out who historically are the conquerors and tyrants of our species – they’re the males.

“Most of the computer games that are really popular with males are territory and aggression-type games.”

I remember back in college how I wished to date a girl who could kick my ass on Nintendo (and later counter-strike). Did Professor Reiss’ findings permanently dash my hopes?

However before I buy completely into the gender implications–I have to wonder if the study is being objective enough? Competitiveness and urge to conquer are not necessarily limited to computer games. I for one have a girlfriend who manages an internet cafe–and she is incredibly competitive, not in computer games but in computer business.

From the same article:

In the study, published recently in the Journal of Psychiatric Research, scientists wired up a series of men and women to an MRI scanner while they played a video game, which involved competing to win on-screen territory by clicking on a series of balls.

After analysing the MRI data, the researchers found participants showed activation in the brain’s mesocorticolimbic centre, the region typically associated with reward and addiction.

To solidify the research, people should wire men and women’s brains over different kinds of competitive activity. That women don’t find computer games their cup of tea does not necessarily say they aren’t more competitive than men–but that they have other outlets to be competitive about.

(Try wiring a man and a woman’s brain during shopping and I might hazard a guess that the results would flip).

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